Sometimes I need a fresh start more than once a day.
The other day I got up late, so I missed my opportunity to breathe before my children got up. So I felt irritated and grouchy. I hadn’t slept well, and the change in season had my allegories all in a twist. Once their little feet hit the bottom of the steps, I know my chances of finishing my cup of coffee are slim to none.
So I was irritated before they even started in on each other. The fighting comes with the morning sun, so regular and predictable. You would think Iw oddly be prepared. But on this particular morning I wasn’t. I lost it. I mean I got into crazy mom-mode before we were even out of our pajamas and my shower.
I raised my voice. I cried. I did a full-out tantrum. It quieted them down, but that was NOT the reaction I was looking for it. After that happened, I know something needed to change. And it wasn’t my children. It was me.
I don’t like to admit my faults to you – but I want to be real. Some days need a fresh start even before nine a.m. It seems so hopeless when we get mad first thing in the morning. Its like the whole day is ruined, doesn’t it? How do you get back on track when you’ve blown it first thing?
God forgives, but how do I get past the mommy guilt?
Grace is available, but how do I let my frustrations go?
How can a day be good when the morning started so bad?
So I’m learning. Friends, I don’t have all the answers, but I’m taking steps. Sometimes it means looking ahead to someone a little further along the path. Don’t we all want a teacher who is just a further along? Don’t we need a mentor who is past a few things, but remembers what its like in the trenches.
The best mom’s who gave me advice eight years ago were the moms of kids about eight-years-old. They remembered. They didn’t chide me when I felt like I didn’t want to hold my newborn through one more tantrum. They understand the exhaustion from a toddler who wouldn’t sleep (or leave me alone). They were just a little further along in the motherhood journey.
So, let me tell you a secret: start today. Just begin a fresh start today. God is meeting you here right now. And He loves you!
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